Blackstone: What's the Deal with the SF Four Seasons Buy and All Those Griddles?

Blackstone: From College Grads to Four Seasons, It's All About the Benjamins

Blackstone. The name alone sounds like some monolithic, shadowy organization. And let's be real, they kinda are. Juggling over a trillion dollars? That's not a company; that's a damn financial ecosystem.

The Hunger Games of Entry-Level Jobs

So, what's the latest from these titans of finance? Turns out, getting your foot in the door at Blackstone is harder than ever. We're talking a 0.2% acceptance rate for their 2025 analyst class. 57,000 applications for 138 spots? Those are worse odds than getting struck by lightning while winning the lottery.

Jon Gray, the heir apparent to CEO Steve Schwarzman, says this is because the private equity career path has become super popular with ambitious young people. Okay, sure. But maybe, just maybe, the insane salaries and prestige have something to do with it? Give me a break.

They're practically grooming kids straight out of diapers. Blackstone is hitting up students as early as sophomore year, pushing their summer internship as the golden ticket. Taylor Kanfer, head of campus recruiting, admits most full-time analysts are hired through the summer program. So, if you're not schmoozing with Blackstone by age 20, you're already behind.

One analyst, Brigitte Webb, even admitted that hearing the acceptance rate was "surreal" after all the networking she did. Networking? Please. It's called sucking up, and these kids are pros at it. I respect the hustle, I guess. But doesn't this feel a bit… dystopian? Are we training future financiers or Stepford Wives in pinstripe suits?

From Wall Street to Luxury Hotels

But it's not all about the kids. Blackstone is also making moves in the real world. They're apparently nearing a deal to buy the Four Seasons hotel in downtown San Francisco for around $130 million. A steal, considering the original asking price was $181.6 million. So Blackstone is getting a deal on a hotel while crushing the souls of college grads.

The article claims this purchase "highlights its commitment to the luxury hotel market amid the economic recovery in San Francisco." Translation: they see an opportunity to make a boatload of money off rich tourists and business travelers. Offcourse, who doesn't love a luxurious stay at the Four Seasons?

San Francisco's hotel market is apparently on the upswing, thanks to falling crime rates and the mayor's crackdown on homeless encampments. So, basically, they're cleaning up the streets to make the city more appealing to wealthy visitors. Progress? Maybe. Cynical? Absolutely.

Blackstone expects to deploy over $500 billion into European opportunities over the next decade as themes such as digitalisation, AI, electrification, and reindustrialisation accelerate. Franck Petitgas, formerly of Morgan Stanley and the UK House of Lords, is joining as Vice Chairman, Europe, to help with this initiative. He views Blackstone as “the most consequential firm in investing today.” Well, he would say that, wouldn't he? But is he right? Blackstone taps ex-Morgan Stanley Franck Petitgas as Europe Vice Chairman in major leadership expansion – Private Equity Insights

The Blackstone Machine Keeps Churning

Blackstone has been active in Europe for more than 25 years and has invested in more than $350bn of assets in the region across private equity, real estate, credit, and infrastructure. Blackstone is deploying capital to address major investment needs across Europe. They want to strengthen the firm’s focus on supporting growth, innovation, and long-term value creation.

But let's be real, "long-term value creation" for whom? Because it sure as hell ain't for the average Joe. It's for their shareholders and the elite few who benefit from this constant churn of capital. Then again, maybe I'm just jealous I didn't get into Blackstone. Nah, I'd rather keep my soul.

So, What's the Real Game Here?

Blackstone is a finely tuned machine designed to extract wealth. They're snapping up hotels, grooming future financiers, and expanding their empire across the globe. It's all about the Benjamins, baby. Ain't nothing else to it.